a) No of course I can’t afford them
b) Yes it is completely immoral to spend enough to feed a family of four for two months, on a pair of shoes.
However, they are currently on my feet. A year of buying no new clothes, never having a takeaway coffee or going out for drinks, worrying every time you spend anything because you’re saving for your wedding, will do that to a girl – or this one, anyway. (Alternative explanations may be found under the headings Pink stilletos will not be the answer to your identity crisis, but they may solve your wardrobe’s and If it is still cold enough to snow in March and you have baked enough cake to fuel a sumo army, try shoes).
Now I just need somewhere to wear them. I thought they’d be satisfied with dinner and my upcoming hen do, but they’ve whispered that actually what they’d really like is to see this, possibly followed by drinks here.
Anyone fancy coming with me?